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Showing posts from December, 2012

The Campaign: 10+ Things I Learned Watching The Campaign with Will Ferrell and Zach Galifianakis

You can get used to the smell of a port a potty. Can't is the real c word. People can crap gold. To make your farts glow, put a fire fly in your butt hole. A snake bite can give you an erection. Nobody can force you to live in Rainbowland. To improve your approval rating, try making a sex tape with your opponent's wife and putting it on TV. Drew Carey drives some women to touch themselves. There is an alternate version of the prayer "Our Father". Nova Scotia is a country. Punching a baby and a dog will not prevent you from winning an election.

Obama flirts with Thailand Prime Minister Yingluck Shinawatra?

Obama with Thai Prime Minister . . .judge for yourself. Michelle Obama no likey Check out Obama flirting with the Danish prime minister

Depression tips - Five reasons to constrict your anus

This book says that constricting your anus and denting your navel 100 times in succession everyday is effective. Doing this will enable you to say good-bye to depression and take back your youth.  Here are the top five reasons why you should take this advice: It can be done anywhere. Get rid of stress and say good bye to depression. It can give a good gun or good pliers to man or woman. It reverses the aging process. A healthy buttocks is a happy buttocks. Someone please try this and post your results in the comment section.

The Eye Test

Can you find the two B’s? (DON’T skip, or your wishes won’t come true…)  RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR RRRRRRRRRRRBRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR RRRRRRRRRRBRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR Once you’ve found the B’s, find the 1…  IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII  IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII  IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII  IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII  IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII  IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII  IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII  IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII  IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII1III  IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII  IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII Once you ’ ve found the 1, find the 6…  9999999999999999999999999999999999  999999999999

Brain Exercise

If you can read this OUT LOUD, you have a strong mind. And better than that: Alzheimer’s is a long, long, way down the road before it ever gets anywhere near you. Only  very good minds can read this. This is weird, but interesting! 7H15 M3554G3 53RV35 7O PR0V3 H0W 0UR M1ND5 C4N D0 4M4Z1NG 7H1NG5! 1MPR3551V3 7H1NG5! 1N 7H3 B3G1NN1NG 17 WA5 H4RD BU7 N0W, 0N 7H15 LIN3 Y0UR M1ND 1S R34D1NG 17 4U70M471C4LLY W17H 0U7 3V3N 7H1NK1NG 4B0U7 17, B3 PROUD! 0NLY C3R741N P30PL3 C4N R3AD 7H15. PL3453 F0RW4RD 1F U C4N R34D 7H15. If you can read this, you are one of the 55 people out of 100 who can. I cdnuolt blveiee that I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd what I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in what oerdr the ltteres in a word are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is that the frsit and last ltteer be in the rghit

Crow joke

Well, it is not a pretty story.... about 200 dead crows near Worcester, Mass and there was  concern for Avian Flu.  They had a Bird Pathologist examine the remains of all the crows, and he confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian Flu, to everyone's  relief. However, he determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, and only 2% were killed by car impact. The city then hired a  Ornithological Behaviourist to determine the disproportionate percentages for  truck versus car kill. The Ornithological Behaviourist determined the cause in short order. When  crows eat road kill, they always post a "look-out Crow" in a nearby tree, to warn of  impending danger. His conclusion was that the lookout crow could say "Cah", but he could not say "Truck." Share this here:

Special story - Two men saving a lamb

Helpful household tip of the day - taco shells

Helpful household tip of the day - sandwich

Helpful household tip of the day - ground beef

Hillbilly Wheelbarrow recliner

Animals Do Get Married joke

Holy e-mail Maxine joke

One day God was looking down at earth and saw all of the rascally behavior that was going on...   So He called His angels and sent one to earth for a time.   When the angel returned, he told God,'Yes, it is bad on earth; 95% are misbehaving and only 5% are not. God thought for a moment and said, 'Maybe I had better send down a second angel to get another opinion.'   So God called another angel and sent her to earth for a time.   When the angel returned she went to God and said, 'Yes, it's true. The earth is in decline; 95% are misbehaving, but 5% are being good...' God was not pleased.   So He decided to e-mail the 5% who were good, because he wanted to encourage them, and give them a little something to help them keep going. Do you know what the e-mail said?   Okay, I was just wondering, because I didn't

Random cute animal pictures

Sister Mary Ann's Gasoline - joke

SISTER MARY ANN'S GASOLINE Sister Mary Ann, who worked for a home health agency, was out making her rounds visiting homebound patients when she ran out of gas. As luck would have it, a Texaco Gasoline station was just a block away. She walked to the station to borrow a gas can and buy some gas. The attendant told her that the only gas can he owned had been loaned out, but she could wait until it was returned. Since Sister Mary Ann was on the way to see a patient, she decided not to wait and walked back to her car. She looked for something in her car that she could fill with gas and spotted the bedpan she was taking to the patient. Always resourceful, Sister Mary Ann carried the bedpan to the station, filled it with gasoline, and carried the full bedpan back to her car. As she was pouring the gas into her tank, two Baptists watched from across the street.. One of them turned to the other and said, 'If it starts, I'm turning Catholic.'!!

Helpful household tip of the day - Doritos

Peacock in full flight pictures

  This is a rare opportunity for this. We never imagined that it could be so magnificent - like a phoenix in a fairy tale! Please save and share with good friends as it is not every day we can see such beauty!!!