Friday, April 18, 2014

The King who had four wives

Once upon a time there was a rich King who had four wives.

He loved the 4th wife the most and adorned her with rich robes and
treated her to the finest of delicacies. He gave her nothing but the best.

He also loved the 3rd wife very much and was always showing her off to
neighboring kingdoms. However, he feared that one day she would leave him
for another.
He also loved his 2nd wife. She was his confidant and was always kind,
considerate and patient with him. Whenever the King faced a problem, he
could confide in her, and she would help him get through the difficult
times.

The King's 1st wife was a very loyal partner and had made great
contributions in maintaining his wealth and kingdom. However, he did not
love the first wife. Although she loved him deeply, he hardly took notice
of her!
One day, the King fell ill and he knew his time was short. He thought of
his luxurious life and wondered, I now have four wives with me, but when
I die, I'll be all alone."

Thus, he asked the 4th wife, "I loved you the most, endowed you with the
finest clothing and showered great care over you. Now that I'm dying,
will you follow me and keep me company?"

"No way!", replied the 4th wife, and she walked away without another
word.
Her answer cut like a sharp knife right into his heart.

The sad King then asked the 3rd wife, "I loved you all my life. Now that
I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?"

"No!", replied the 3rd wife. "Life is too good! When you die, I'm going to
remarry!" His heart sank and turned cold.

He then asked the 2nd wife, "I have always turned to you for help and
you've always been there for me. When I die, will you follow me and keep
me company?"

"I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time!", replied the 2nd wife. "At
the very most, I can only walk with you to your grave." Her answer struck
him like a bolt of lightning, and the King was devastated.

Then a voice called out: "I'll go with you. I'll follow you no matter
where you go."
The King looked up, and there was his first wife. She was very skinny as
she suffered from malnutrition and neglect. Greatly grieved, the King said,
"I should have taken much better care of you when I had the chance!"

In truth, we all have the 4 wives in our lives:

Our 4th wife is our body. No matter how much time and effort we lavish in
making it look good, it will leave us when we die.

Our 3rd wife is our possessions, status and wealth. When we die, it will
all go to others.

Our 2nd wife is our family and friends. No matter how much they have been
there for us, the furthest they can stay by us is up to the grave.
And our 1st wife is our Soul. Often neglected in pursuit of wealth, power
and pleasures of the world. However, our Soul is the only thing that will
follow us wherever we go.

Cultivate, strengthen and cherish it now, for it is the only part of us
that will follow us to the throne of God and continue with us throughout
Eternity.

Thought for the day:

Remember, when the world pushes you to your knees, you're in the
perfect position to pray.

Pass this on to someone you care about - I just did.

Being happy doesn't mean everything's perfect. It means you've decided to
see beyond the imperfections!

Chelsea Clinton is pregnant

Chelsea Clinton announced Thursday that she’s pregnant with her first child.

The father is Marc Mezvinsky, a hedge fund manager and co-founder of Eaglevale Partners, and Chelsea Clinton were married in 2010. They knew each other as students at Washington’s Sidwell Friends School and Stanford University but didn’t start dating until 2005.

Read about Marc's father and the Clinton connection here.

Thursday, April 17, 2014

25 WAYS TO TELL YOU'RE GROWN UP



  1. YOUR HOUSE PLANTS ARE ALIVE, AND YOU CAN'T SMOKE ANY OF THEM.
  2. HAVING SEX IN A TWIN BED IS OUT OF THE QUESTION.
  3. YOU KEEP MORE FOOD THAN BEER IN THE FRIDGE.
  4. 6:00 AM IS WHEN YOU GET UP, NOT WHEN YOU GO TO BED.
  5. YOU HEAR YOUR FAVORITE SONG IN AN ELEVATOR.
  6. YOU WATCH THE WEATHER CHANNEL.
  7. YOUR FRIENDS MARRY AND DIVORCE INSTEAD OF "HOOKUP" AND "BREAKUP".
  8. YOU GO FROM 130 DAYS OF VACATION TIME TO 14.
  9. JEANS AND A SWEATER NO LONGER QUALIFY AS DRESSED UP.
  10. YOU'RE THE ONE CALLING THE POLICE BECAUSE THOSE &@#! KIDS NEXT DOOR WON'T TURN DOWN THE STEREO.
  11. OLDER RELATIVES FEEL COMFORTABLE TELLING SEX JOKES AROUND YOU.
  12. YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT TIME TACO BELL CLOSES ANYMORE.
  13. YOUR CAR INSURANCE GOES DOWN AND YOUR CAR PAYMENTS GO UP.
  14. YOU FEED YOUR DOG SCIENCE DIET INSTEAD OF MCDONALD'S LEFTOVERS.
  15. SLEEPING ON THE COUCH MAKES YOUR BACK HURT.
  16. YOU TAKE NAPS.
  17. DINNER AND A MOVIE IS THE WHOLE DATE INSTEAD OF THE BEGINNING OF ONE.
  18. EATING A BASKET OF CHICKEN WINGS AT 3 AM WOULD SEVERELY UPSET, RATHER THAN SETTLE YOUR STOMACH.
  19. YOU GO TO THE DRUG STORE FOR IBUPROFEN AND ANTACID, NOT CONDOMS AND PREGNANCY TESTS.
  20. A $4.00 BOTTLE OF WINE IS NO LONGER "PRETTY GOOD SHIT".
  21. YOU ACTUALLY EAT BREAKFAST FOOD AT BREAKFAST TIME.
  22. "I JUST CAN'T DRINK THE WAY I USED TO" REPLACES "I'M NEVER GOING TO DRINK THAT MUCH AGAIN".
  23. 90% OF THE TIME YOU SPEND IN FRONT OF A COMPUTER IS FOR REAL WORK.
  24. YOU DRINK AT HOME TO SAVE MONEY BEFORE GOING TO A BAR.
  25. WHEN YOU FIND OUT YOUR FRIEND IN PREGNANT YOU CONGRATULATE THEM INSTEAD OF ASKING "OH SHIT WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?"
  26. BONUS: YOU READ THIS ENTIRE LIST LOOKING DESPERATELY FOR ONE SIGN THAT DOESN'T APPLY TO YOU AND CAN'T FIND ONE TO SAVE YOUR SORRY OLD ASS.  THEN YOU FORWARD IT TO A BUNCH OF OLD FRIENDS 'CAUSE YOU KNOW THEY'LL ENJOY IT TOO.  AND NOW YOU KNOW WHY I'M FORWARDING THIS TO YOU...

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

The Department of Energy


The Department of Energy was instituted on 8-04-1977 
  
TO LESSEN  OUR DEPENDENCE ON FOREIGN OIL. 
  
Hey, pretty efficient, huh????? 
AND NOW IT IS 2009, 32 YEARS LATER  .... AND THE BUDGET FOR THIS 
 
NECESSARY DEPARTMENT IS AT $24.2 BILLION A YEAR     
  
 THEY HAVE 16,000 FEDERAL EMPLOYEES  AND APPROXIMATELY100,000 CONTRACT EMPLOYEES

 
 AND LOOK AT THE JOB THEY HAVE DONE!

THIS IS WHERE YOU SLAP YOUR FOREHEAD AND SAY "WHAT WAS I THINKING?"

 
Ah yes, good old bureaucracy.
 
And NOW we are going to turn the Banking System & the Auto Industry over to them? 
 
  God Help Us !!!

Monday, April 14, 2014

Eastern Diamondback Rattlesnake

Be careful out there, that sunshine grows them big!!!!
 
 
THIS IS WHAT YOU MAY FIND IN THE AREA BEHIND THE ST. AUGUSTINE OUTLETS THAT ARE ON THE EAST SIDE OF I-95. NO JOKE!
 
Found on a golf course in Florida .This is why you shouldn't go looking for the golf balls hit 'Out of Bounds' in Florida !!!


THIS IS NOT A PYTHON!
This is a 15 foot Eastern Diamondback rattlesnake - the largest ever caught on record.
This snake was found Near the St. Augustine outlet, in a new KB homes subdivision just south of Jacksonville FL.
A little research revealed the following:
One bite from a snake of this size would contain enough venom to kill over 40 full grown men.
The head of this snake alone is larger than the hand of a normal sized man.
A bite from those fangs would be comparable to being stabbed by two curved, 1/4 inch diameter screwdrivers.
The knife being used to draw out the fangs for the bottom picture has a blade around 6 inches long.

This snake is estimated to have weighed over 170 pounds.


(How much do you weigh?)

Notice the girth of this snake as compared to the cop's leg in the first picture (and he is not a small man).

A snake of this size could easily swallow a 2 year-old child (and dogs, pigs, etc).

A snake this size has an approximately 5 1/2 foot accurate striking distance.


(The distance for an average size rattlesnake is about 2 feet . )

This snake has probably been alive since George Bush Sr.was President.

Now just ask yourself these questions:

What has this snake been feeding on and where are its offspring?