My job search - joke

My job search 1. My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory,         But I got canned.  Couldn't concentrate. 2. Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack,    But just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.  3. After that, I tried being a Tailor,    But wasn't suited for it -- mainly because it was a sew-sew job.   4. Next, I tried working in a Muffler Factory,    But that was too exhausting.  5. Then, tried being a Chef - figured it would add a little spice to my life,   But just didn't have the thyme.  6. Next, I attempted being a Deli Worker,   But any way I sliced it.... Couldn't cut the mustard.  7. My best job was a Musician,    But eventually found I wasn't noteworthy.  8. I studied a long time to become a Doctor,         But didn't have any patience.  9. Next, was a job in a Shoe Factory.      Tried hard but just didn't fit in. 10. I became a Professional Fisherman,    But discovered I couldn't live on my net income.  11. Managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company,          But the work was just too draining. 12. So then I got a job in a Workout Center,      But they said I wasn't fit for the job..   13. After many years of trying to find steady work,   I finally got a job as a Historian - until I realized there was no future in it. 14. My last job was working in Starbucks,       But had to quit because it was the same old grind.     15. SO, I TRIED  RETIREMENT      AND I FOUND I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB!