Beanie Books

  This is what a Sprint tech found when  he went to a cell site to check why  there was no power.

A Simple Lesson! A rat looked through a crack in the wall to see the farmer and his wife opening a package. What food might it contain? He was aghast to discover that it was a rat trap. Retreating to the farmyard the rat proclaimed the warning; "There is a rat trap in the house, a rat trap in the house!" The chicken clucked and scratched, raised her head and said, "Excuse me, Mr. Rat, I can tell this is a grave concern to you, but it is of no consequence to me. I cannot be bothered by it." The rat turned to the pig and told him, "There is a rat trap in the house, a rat trap in the house!" "I am so very sorry Mr. Rat," sympathized the pig, "but there is nothing I can do about it but pray. Be assured that you are in my prayers." The rat turned to the cow. She said, "Like wow, Mr. Rat. A rat trap. I am in grave danger. Duh?" So the rat returned to the house, head down and dejected, to face the farmer's rat trap alone...

  T equila and Salt       There are at least two people in this world  that you would die for. At least 15 people in this world  love you in some way. The only reason anyone would ever hate you  is because they want to  be just like you. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone,  even if they don't  like you. Every night,  SOMEONE thinks about you  before they go to sleep. You mean the world to someone. You are special and unique. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you. When you make the biggest mistake ever,  something good comes from it. When you think the world  has turned its back on you  take another look. Always remember the compliments you received.  Forget about the rude remarks. And always remember..... when life hands you Lemons,  ask for Tequila and Salt and call me over! Good friends are like stars........ You don't always see them,  But you...

The older I get, the more I enjoy Saturday mornings.  Perhaps it's the quiet solitude that comes with being the first to rise, or maybe it's the unbounded joy of not having to be at work.  Either way, the first few hours of a Saturday morning are most enjoyable. A few weeks ago, I was shuffling toward the garage with a steaming cup of coffee in one hand and the morning paper in the other.  What began as a typical Saturday morning turned into one of those lessons that life seems to hand you from time to time. Let me tell you about it. I turned the dial up into the phone portion of the band on my ham radio in order to listen to a Saturday morning swap net.  Along the way, I came across an older sounding chap, with a tremendous signal and a golden voice.  You know the kind, he sounded like he should be in the broadcasting business  He was telling whomever he was talking with something about 'a thousand marbles.'  I was intrigued and stopped to listen to...

Supreme Court rules that a prayer before government meetings is constitutional Writing for the majority, Justice Anthony Kennedy said the prayers should be seen as ceremonial and in keeping with the nation's traditions DID YOU KNOW? DID YOU KNOW?  As you walk up the steps to the building which houses the U.S Supreme Court you can see near the top of the building a row of the world's law givers and each one is facing one in the middle who is facing forward with a full frontal view .. it is Moses and he is holding the Ten Commandments!  DID YOU KNOW?  As you enter the Supreme Court courtroom, the two huge oak doors have the Ten Commandments engraved on each lower portion of each door.  DID YOU KNOW?  As you sit inside the courtroom, you can see the wall, right above where the Supreme Court judges sit, a display of the Ten Commandments!  DID YOU KNOW?  There are Bible verses etched in stone all over the Federal Buildings an...

A cool dog wearing sunglasses and a beer helmet This dog was featured in an  SNL  deleted sketch .

 Jennifer and Jim kept getting huge water bills. They knew beyond a doubt that the bills weren't representative of their actual usage, and no matter how they tried to conserve, the high bills continued.   Although they could see nothing wrong, they had  everything checked for leaks or problems: first the water meter,  then outdoor pipes, indoor pipes, underground pipes, faucets,  toilets, washer, ice maker, etc. --  all to no avail.  One day Jim  was sick and stayed home in bed, but kept hearing water running  downstairs. He finally tore himself from his sick bed to  investigate, and stumbled  onto the cause of such high water bills. Apparently this was happening all day long when they were not at home. Knowing that few would believe him, he taped a segment of the  'problem' for posterity -- see attached  video.

One day, when a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river, her thimble fell into the river. When she cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "My dear child, why are you crying?" The seamstress replied that her thimble had fallen into the water and that she needed it to help her husband in making a living for their family. The Lord dipped His hand into the water and pulled up a golden thimble set with pearls. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked The seamstress replied, "No." The Lord again dipped into the river. He held out a silver thimble ringed with sapphires.  "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked. Again, the seamstress replied, "No." The Lord reached down again and came up with a leather thimble. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked.  The seamstress replied, "Yes." The Lord was pleased with the woman's honesty and gave her all three thimbles to keep, and the seams...

  Bubba meets the girl of his dreams,  his first cousin Emmy Lou.   He takes her out for a special dinner,     and shows her a good time at the  Redneck Carnival at Diggerland. The next day they spend together and  Bubba shows off his water skiing skills.     Later that night, he romances her under  special mood lighting.        A week or so later, Bubba realizes  this relationship is getting serious.  He makes reservations for a  Valentine's Day dinner. Emmy Lou was  so impressed with his thoughtfulness,   they had a special Friday night date  at the Soap & Suds Laundromat !   A month later he proposes to Emmy Lou,      and he buys her a really purdy  engagement ring.     On the day of their wedding, he  tells her how much he loves her just before the ceremony.     Then they're off to th...