Beanie Books

This took place in  Spain .    Spanish police agreed to placate a 'bank hostage'  situation by allowing the radical to 'escape' uninhibited. He was allowed to walk out of the bank in the company of 2 hostages. The police  provided him with a motorcycle and free access to the motorcycle.  Then,  leaving the hostages behind, he was permitted to ride away down a clear roadway to make his escape. This whole incident, shown on CBS television, complete with news reporting in English, can be seen on this 55-second video clip. 

If you want to divorce your husband, tell him at a restaurant instead of a private setting. Conan O'Brian looks like a carrot. If you think Conan O'Brien is sexy, your life may be PG-13. Cuckold is a word that is not used much anymore. 13 is not too old for a babysitter. Some 13 year olds actually spend a lot of time pondering their soul mates. The late Steve Jobs is the only one with the right to wear New Balance sneakers. New Balance sneakers are not appropriate while "picking up chicks" The skin under the eyes can resemble the ball sack of one Hugh Hefner When you want a woman to have sex with you, just say "Let's get outta here" to her and then close the deal. Men won the war of the sexes when women started doing pole dancing for exercise. All any of us can do is play our strength. To pick up women, don't talk about yourself. Don't drink watered down drinks from a straw. If you're in love with a girl, putting her scarlett...

The wife    asked me, "How many women have you slept with?" I proudly replied, "Only you, Darling, with all the others, I was awake." I didn't see it coming! Hospital Visiting Hours are   10 AM  to 8 PM

You know you are too old to Trick or Treat when: You keep knocking on your own front door. You remove your false teeth to change your appearance. You ask for soft high fiber candy only. When someone drops a candy bar in your bag, and you lose your balance and fall over. People say: 'Great Boris Karloff Mask,' And you're not wearing a mask. When the door opens you yell, 'Trick or...' And you can't remember the rest. By the end of the night, you have a bag full of restraining orders. You have to carefully choose a costume that doesn't dislodge your hairpiece. You're the only Power Ranger in the neighborhood with a walker. You keep having to go home to pee.

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"Steve Jobs was the greatest inventor since Thomas Edison. He put the world at our fingertips." --Steven Spielberg Steve Jobs was great and all but he was no Thomas Edison. He didn't invent a lot of what he's famous for and that is perfectly fine. He was an innovator...not an inventor. He brought great ideas and products to the world. His devices were of high quality but they fall under the categories of: MP3 player Smartphone Personal computer iPad - a small laptop computer without a keyboard and a cover Server The originals of these categories are the inventions. If I go take a brush and put a long handle on it, I did not just invent the broom. In the PC world, he sold proprietary, restrictive, and overpriced machines with an uncompromising attitude. He never gave Apple much more that 10% market share and led the company to bankruptcy in the 90's only to be bailed out by Bill Gates . The iPhone, iPod, and iPad were game changers for sure. They sa...