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The Hangover Part II: 15 Things I learned watching The Hangover Part II with Bradley Cooper

  1. A bachelor party can be a brunch at an IHOP.
  2. Your father-in-law is expected to hate you.
  3. There are no Long John Silvers in Thailand.
  4. Muscle relaxants and ADHD medicine can make you forget everything that took place for an entire night..
  5. When a monkey nibbles on a penis, it is funny in any language.
  6. If you forget all the bad stuff that happens to you, it never happened.
  7. A safe place to keep your valuable bank codes and such is in the vest of a monkey drug mole.
  8. One day, maybe monkeys will be able to Skype.
  9. If you say "hello" like "hallo" it lets the person know that he is in trouble.
  10. If a promising, young, genius, future doctor loses a finger, he won't care as long as he had the time of his life.
  11. The kid's father won't care either and won't mind that his future son-in-law is partially responsible.
  12. If you return from a two day trip to Bangkok with a Mike Tyson tattoo, your bride won't mind and won't ask questions.
  13. You can earn the respect of your future father-in-law by showing up to your wedding late with a Mike Tyson tattoo, nearly crashing a boat into the wedding reception, and bringing his son back with a finger missing. After that, go off on him to finish winning him over.
  14. Sequels are usually worse than their predecessor.
  15. You can try to avoid the sequels are usually worse rule by making the exact same movie.

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