Female vs. male poems

Female vs. male poems - joke

FEMALE POEM
I want a man who's handsome, smart and strong
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I want him to be gainfully employed,
And when I spend his cash, he won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,

Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! For a man who makes love to my mind,

and knows how to answer "How big is my behind?"
I want for this man love me to no end,
And to always be my very best friend.

MALE POEM
I want a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a liquor store and a bass boat. I know this doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit.

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Male logic joke

*This is a story which is perfectly logical to all males:* A wife asks her husband, "Could you please go shopping for me and buy one carton of milk, and if they have eggs, get 6." A short time later the husband comes back with 6 cartons of milk. The wife asks him, "Why the hell did you buy 6 cartons of milk?" He replied, "They had eggs."

Earth's wobble causes global warming

EARTH’S WOBBLE CAUSES GLOBAL WARNING, NOT CO2 EMISSIONS OR OCEAN CURRENTS, PER TEAM HEADED BY OSU RESEARCHER Digital Journal, “Debate Ends on Central Cause of Earth’s Cooling & Warming,” 8 Aug 2009; Space Daily, “Ice Ages Linked to Slight Shifts in Solar Radiation,” 24 Aug 2009; The Kiplinger Letter, “Climate Change Legislation, What it Means to Business,” 18 Aug 2009. As the carbon dioxide management bill - aka cap and trade - looms in Congress, a new study from Oregon State University emerges that ends the scientific debate on the central causes of ice ages and warming periods on Earth. Former U.S. Vice President Al Gore is fond of saying that the scientific debate on global warming is over - and while he may now be correct in the fact that a debate has come to an end, the central cause behind climate change does not support the carbon cap legislation that is being cobbled together by Mr. Gore and his Democratic allies in the U.S. Congress. The ear

Funny dog pictures - If Dogs Worked in Offices

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